This week on Simple Living Sunday, it’s time to get real. Authenticity seems to be an increasingly rare quality in our world, with people constantly trying to impress and live up to other people’s standards. Today, we’ll look at why being truly authentic is good for your mental health, and small steps you can take to be true to yourself.

With our social media feeds constantly showing the embellished highlight reels of our friends’ lives, it’s easy to see why someone might feel like they don’t measure up. Despite the constant pressure to impress others, the best thing you can do is put aside all the comparisons and just be the greatest version of yourself.

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of someone else.

Judy Garland

We’ll chat more about authenticity in a minute. But first, let’s recap the past week.

Three simple pleasures and highlights

Last week’s simple living theme was beautiful things. Here are three beautiful things from the week gone by.

• We had a nice visit with my Mum last weekend.
• One of my co-workers came back to work after being off for 18 months for cancer treatment.
• The sight of several cardinals at our bird feeder on a snowy morning really lifted my spirits.

This week’s simple living focus: Being truly authentic

If you asked me to define my core values, authenticity would be pretty high on the list. I’m an honest, what-you-see-is-what-you-get, kind of person. I don’t have the energy or the desire to try to be something I’m not. But it took me many years to get to that point.

When I was younger, I worried constantly about what other people thought of me. Thank goodness I grew up before social media because repeatedly seeing images of beautiful people showing off their seemingly-perfect lives would have been too much for me in those days. I can see how damaging that can be to young people who see every party they didn’t get invited to, and every made-up selfie posted by acquaintances.

In fact, FOMO (fear of missing out) is contributing to lower self-esteem, trouble with sleep, and anxiety in our young people according to countless studies, including one from the University of Glasgow.

Maybe it’s the wisdom of age, but I decided long ago to stop trying to impress others by pretending to be something I’m not. I don’t have the time for that and, quite honestly, anyone who can’t accept me as I am doesn’t belong in my life.    

Authenticity is about being true to who you are, even when everyone around you wants you to be someone else.

Michael Jordan

There will always be someone to criticize how you look, how you speak, what you wear, and the things you have—or don’t have. Sometimes that criticism is well-meaning and constructive. Often, it comes from the critic’s own insecurity, or their need to feel superior.

So, what can we do to be a little more real and truly authentic?

---

Let’s keep in touch! Join my mailing list and I’ll email you when I add a new post.

---

Three things to do this week

Being truly authentic comes down to being comfortable in your own skin. It isn’t something that happens overnight. If this is a problem area for you, here are three things to try this week to get you just a little bit closer.

Reflect on your values

A best first step is to take some time to define your values. Think about what really matters to you.

This can be a difficult task if you’ve spent your life trying to please others. Here’s a little exercise to get the thought process going. 

If your doctor told you tomorrow you had just two years to live, how would you spend your remaining time? What would you do or not do? Who would you spend your time with? Would you have any regrets?

This may feel like a morbid exercise, but putting yourself in that situation is the best way to get to the core of what really matters to you.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.

Steve Jobs

Be selective about what you say yes to

Now that you’ve given some thought to your values, start putting them into practice.

When someone asks you to do something, get into the habit of asking yourself if it aligns with your values. If it doesn’t, respectfully decline if you can. The same principle applies to how you choose to spend your money. Will that product or service really change your life or move you closer to your goals? If not, you probably don’t need it.

Now, this sounds great but, when it comes to our jobs, we all have to do things we don’t want to. But if your job constantly puts you in conflict with your core values, maybe it’s time to consider a career change.

We need to find the courage to say no to the things and people who are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and life our lives with authenticity.

Barbara De Angelis

Flex your honesty muscle

Honesty is a huge part of being truly authentic. If you’re a people pleaser, you might be tempted to tell little white lies to avoid hurting others’ feelings. This week, try to be a little more honest in those situations.

Being honest may not get you many friends, but it’ll always get you the right ones.

John Lennon

If people ask for your opinion, give it—tactfully, of course. The people who matter will respect you for it. If they don’t, maybe they don’t really matter.

---

It’s time to stop comparing ourselves to others and just be real. It’s your life after all.

Do you have any other tips for being your authentic self? Tell me your ideas below.